y.de.chu's

No relience

I can’t sleep well nowadays again. I kept waking up at the middle, feeling I had to wake up to do something or to avoid something, having frequent dreams if I’m not mistaken. Now I miss the one week period with cool weather, days when I climbed to bed before midnight, slept through the night, and woke up early, so early that I even had the time to sit in front of my laptop to check mail and to read news before my 8.30am class. Aikss.. how come I suddenly feel that it sounds like an old folk’s life? >< hahaha…

I had a ‘nap’ from 7pm to 10pm, and yesh, that was a terribly unstable sleep. Of course lar, nap for so long while I haven’t touch my book at all for tomorrow’s counselling class review and the cross cultural report I told myself to finish today.

Today, I told myself. I’m gonna rely on myself for things; never ever trust that there will be anyone to share. When there’s no expectation in the first place, there will be no disappointment. Disappointment is a terrible feeling for me. I rather torture myself to bear more responsibilities than to feel disappointed.

And I receive a forward email that comes at the right time.

We came across these phrases often as a Chinese reader, too often that we don’t stop and ponder upon the meanings. At times like this, when one’s confused, the thinking come, and they mean a lot.

So… time to look forward and walk… alone… and carefully… with full alertness.